The Conversation Technique That Solves Big Problems

Hi Reader,

💡 Today's Niblit: Brené Brown introduces the concept of "rumbling" in Dare to Lead — a specific type of conversation that replaces surface-level discussion with deep, honest dialogue. Leaders who master rumbling unlock the real thinking in their teams and solve problems others can't even see.

🔑 Key Insight: A rumble isn't just a difficult conversation — it's a discussion defined by commitment to vulnerability, curiosity, and sticking with the messy middle of problem-solving rather than jumping to quick fixes. It's about leaning into discomfort instead of managing it away.

Imagine the difference between skipping stones across a lake versus diving to explore what's beneath the surface. Most workplace conversations are stone-skipping — we touch on issues briefly, create some ripples, then move on. Rumbling is diving deep. You're willing to go underwater, stay down longer than feels comfortable, and explore what others won't touch.

This matters because the biggest breakthroughs happen in the space between "we have a problem" and "here's the solution." Most teams rush through this space because it's uncomfortable. But rumbling teaches you to live in that discomfort long enough to discover insights that quick fixes miss entirely.

🦉 Nibble of Wisdom: "Let's rumble. A rumble is a discussion, conversation, or meeting defined by a commitment to lean into vulnerability, stay curious and generous, stick with the messy middle of problem identification and solving..." — Dare to Lead, part 1

🛠️ Practical Tip: Replace your next performance review with a rumble conversation. Start with "I'm curious about..." or "The story I'm making up is..." instead of leading with judgments or solutions.

🚀 Quick Action: Practice rumble starters this week. When someone brings you a problem, respond with "Tell me more about that" or "What am I missing?" instead of immediately offering advice. Notice how the quality of information changes when you stay curious longer.

🔍 Further Exploration:

• Pay attention to when you feel the urge to "fix" or move on during difficult conversations
• Reflect on which relationships in your life involve the most honest dialogue — those are your rumbling partners
• Explore the concept of active constructive responding and how it deepens conversations beyond surface reactions

🎬 Wrapup: Remember, the goal isn't to win the conversation — it's to understand what's really happening beneath the surface. When you're willing to rumble, you're not just solving today's problem, you're building the trust that prevents tomorrow's.

🔗 Links:

• Check out Dare to Lead by Brené Brown on Amazon
• ​Dare to Lead on Kindle​
• ​Dare to Lead Audiobook​
• ​How to read Dare to Lead for FREE​
• ​Dare to Lead Podcast with Brené Brown​

Ready to rumble,

Tom "diving deeper daily" Bernthal

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